Overdue Update
It’s been awhile since we’ve posted an update so here is a bit of what we’ve been up to!
Lots of Learning
This summer was filled with learning: learning about ourselves, each other, and how to be nurturing and effective parents to a child following adoption. This learning has enabled us to feel more prepared to parent as well as foster a secure attachment with our child.
One of the trainings that we attended equipped us to better handle questions and comments from others. A great video was shared to give us a light-hearted spin: “If you wouldn’t say it about a boob job…” If you’re ready for a chuckle, it’s a quick 2:38 video from adoptive parents. We also purchased a book called “In On It: What Adoptive Parents Would Like You To Know About Adoption. A Guide for Relatives and Friends” by Elisabeth O’Toole. We have shared our copy and hope that it continues to make the rounds through our family and friends!
We plan to spend time after the arrival of our child using a cocooning method of parenting in order to develop a secure attachment with our child. What this means is that until we feel that a secure bond is formed, we will be the only ones to hold, feed, diaper, and provide for our child. This method will help minimize the trauma and shock that an infant may experience when leaving the womb after hearing the same sounds, rhythms, and feelings and comes into an environment that is completely new and foreign (without any of those familiar and comforting inputs). Our agency has provided a lot of resources and research and we feel that this method of attachment style parenting will be best for all of us. We may need support in other ways (prayers, help with our pup, food, laundry, company, etc.) and will happily accept visitors; however, until we feel comfortable with our attachment, we will be doing the holding. We hope all of our family and friends will respect and support our decision and we will make sure to announce when we’re ready to accept cuddlers!
Update on Progress
The burning question: “How’s adoption going?”. Our answer: it’s going! We’ve submitted and had all 54 of our pages of autobiography reviewed, we’ve completed all required trainings, much of our paperwork is complete, and we are meeting with our Social Worker for the last time before our Home Visit! It feels like we’ve been working on this step for a LONG time but also that there’s no way we’re almost done. When we got an email from the paperwork guru at EVOLVE saying that our “master file is almost complete!” I think we both did a happy dance!
What comes next?
We will have a home visit from our Social Worker where we will also have 1:1 interviews. She will then write up our Home Study paperwork for the state so that we are approved for adoption. During that time we’ll be working on our profile books that expectant parents will look through and filling out additional paperwork for the various agencies across the nation that we could work with. After that, we will be patiently waiting being matched! In the meantime, we welcome prayers as we finish up this last leg of the process.
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